I’m so pleased our paths are crossing.

Being a person is hard work. Our lives are complex and navigating the world is challenging even in the best of circumstances. I find this equal parts fascinating and infuriating. Some days I want everyone to just get along and others I see that it is only in the friction that we truly learn about ourselves.

I foundationally, in my bones, believe that everyone, every single person, holds within them the capacity for a secure, healthy life. Spending my professional days as a witness, facilitator, guide, and sometimes student, sometimes teacher, has been the thing that brings out the light within me.

When people ask me why I became a therapist, this is what I say:

Some folks have a job, some have a calling. I’m one of those lucky people who knew what I wanted to do from a young age and then went and did it.

Being a psychotherapist is the work of my heart. I’ve been doing it for nearly 20 years and I’ll keep doing it as long as I’m able.

What have you been doing for those 20 years?

Let’s start with training first:

I went to graduate school at Gonzaga University where I earned my MA in counseling.

I have the most significant training in evidence based attachment models like:

Circle of Security- a model that breaks down how and why we bond into tangible pieces, including what it feels like and how we protect ourselves when things go sideways.
Child/Parent Psychotherapy- a model and path for children who have been traumatized by a parent to find repair with that parent.
ARC- An integration of the most important pieces of change, starting with the building blocks of attachment, developing self-regulation, and finally the development of a sense of who you are in the world.

I also have extensive training in:

EMDR- a way to target the specific stuck memories, beliefs, and sensations of painful patterns and bring them intentionally into processing.
The Wheel of Consent- an actual map (in my opinion) for developing the skills of secure attachment.

I’m also wildly interested in:

Polyvagal Theory- the human biology of stress and how to align with our bodies to move through it.
Authentic Relating- another model which offers core skills of secure attachment.
Interpersonal Neurobiology- the study of how our bodies and our relationships are never separate. To find safety and well-being in one, you must have both.

Now the experience!

Before going to graduate school, I worked with children in different settings. I provided in-home services to autistic kids, spent summers as a camp counselor, and worked as a residential counselor for kids in a behavioral health home.

My first time in the therapy seat was as an intern working with young, first time parents who lived below the poverty line. There I watched in real time how infants and parents negotiate connection and how this translates into life-long patterns.

Shortly after graduating, I worked with the same organization to do in-home counseling for new parents. My trusty Subaru and I went all over town bringing mental health support to those who needed it most.

Early in my career, I spent two years on a research team looking at the intersection of complex trauma, attachment, and learning in elementary schools and Head Start programs. I developed curriculum on these topics for teachers, paraeducators, administrators, and more.

I spent close to 10 years leading outpatient mental health programs in community agencies. I developed and grew programs, trained therapists and other helpers, and worked with state and federal systems to deliver the best possible care to teenagers, young children, parents, and adults.

I’ve been in private practice for more than 12 years cumulatively. I’ve worked with all kinds of folks, from truck drivers to nurses and doctors to executives to stay at home parents and on and on. Sitting one on one with someone, being their home base, while they work through the mire between where they are and who they are is the privilege of my life.

Do you do anything besides being a therapist?

I sure do!

I grew up in Montana, so naturally I love the outdoors. To me, being outside isn’t a hobby, it’s a way of being. I spend a lot of my time rock climbing, paddle boarding, hiking, and gardening. I’m interested in native plants and am currently switching my yard over, one wildflower at a time.

I love to read and my favorite books tend to be novels which explore life’s complexities (although my absolute favorite book is The Princess Bride, so I suppose I can’t take myself too seriously).

I have traveled to more than fifteen countries (so far) and truly cherish the experiences and relationships that were created.

I’m also really interested in the ideas encompassed in the minimalism movement and am constantly striving to create an intentional and value-based life. I spent years living in a tiny home I built (with a lot of help) and have my sights set on living tiny again.

I’m a very committed Auntie to eight nieces and nephews and spend lots of time in full play mode.

Learning is important to me and I try to always be immersed in something new. These days it’s the piano. My poor neighbors!

Speaking of neighbors, I believe in being a good one. I run a Little Free Pantry in my yard, I volunteer often, and I try to do my part for the planet.

“Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all the time, made new.”

— Ursula K. Le Guin

A quick question:

Great questions. My name is Scandinavian so it’s pronounced “Kahr-in” rather than “Care-in”. If you need a trick to remember, I tell folks to think of the old magazine, Car and Driver (kar-in).